10 Effective Ways To Manage Your Anger

April 6, 2016

2 minutes read

We have all lost our temper on something or to someone, but after a while we feel so bad because our reaction might not have been a smart one. To some anger is a big problem, such that other people avoid them at all costs. Everyone has a physical reaction to anger. Be aware of what your body is telling you, and take steps to calm yourself down. You can control your anger, and you have a responsibility to do so.

1. Recognize Your Anger Signs.

Your heart beats faster and you breathe more quickly, preparing you for action. You might also notice other signs, such as tension in your shoulders or clenching your fists. If you notice these signs, get out of the situation if you’ve got a history of losing control.

2. Think Before You Speak.

In the heat of the moment, it’s easy to say something you’ll later regret. Take a few moments to collect your thoughts before saying anything and allow others involved in the situation to do the same. Be quick to listen and slow to speak.

3. Once Calm, Express Your Anger.

As soon as you’re thinking clearly, express your frustration in an assertive but non-confrontational way. State your concerns and needs clearly and directly, without hurting others or trying to control them. Discussing your feelings with a friend can be useful and can help you get a different perspective on the situation.

4. Get Some Exercise

Physical activity can help reduce stress that can cause you to become angry. If you feel your anger escalating, go for a brisk walk or run, or spend some time doing other enjoyable physical activities. Exercise as part of your daily life is a good way to get rid of irritation and anger.

5. Take A Timeout

Timeouts aren’t just for kids. Give yourself short breaks during times of the day that tend to be stressful. A few moments of quiet time might help you feel better prepared to handle what’s ahead without getting irritated or angry.

6. Identify Possible Solutions

Instead of focusing on what made you mad, work on resolving the issue at hand. Does your child’s messy room drive you crazy? Close the door. Is your partner late for dinner every night? Schedule meals later in the evening or agree to eat on your own a few times a week. Remind yourself that anger won’t fix anything and might only make it worse.

7. Don’t Hold A Grudge

Forgiveness is a powerful tool. If you allow anger and other negative feelings to crowd out positive feelings, you might find yourself swallowed up by your own bitterness or sense of injustice. But if you can forgive someone who angered you, you might both learn from the situation. It’s unrealistic to expect everyone to behave exactly as you want at all times.

8. Use Humor To Release Tension

Lightening up can help diffuse tension. Use humor to help you face what’s making you angry and, possibly, any unrealistic expectations you have for how things should go. Avoid sarcasm, though it can hurt feelings and make things worse.

9. Breathe Slowly

Breathe out for longer than you breathe in, and relax as you breathe out. You automatically breathe in more than out when you’re feeling angry, and the trick is to breathe out more than in. This will calm you down effectively and help you think more clearly.

10. Know When To Seek Help.

Learning to control anger is a challenge for everyone at times. Consider seeking help for anger issues if your anger seems out of control, causes you to do things you regret or hurts those around you.