Relationships are exactly where we should seek tranquil and peace. It only gets daunting if you get the nasty statements and the shaming. That is never going to improve you but rather will get your mental health ruined. Today we avail information that might act as eye opener to you. We give insights into how you can know if you are being shamed by your lover.
They see your vulnerability as a weakness and use it against you.
“Man up. You have to be stronger.” Sound familiar? This mantra is devastatingly common in our culture and we hear it regardless of gender. Often labeled as “too emotional” and “too needy,” I’ve been on the recipient end of this advice.
They constantly compare you to others.
“You are just like your mother/father!” This wouldn’t be so bad if it was meant as a compliment, but let’s face it: it usually isn’t. Comparison is the thief of happiness and is a serious shame trigger. Another common statement would be “(name of ex) would never have done something like this” or “(name of friend)’s wife/girlfriend doesn’t make it like this.
They compare you to who you used to be.
People are dynamic — they change and grow over time. It’s near impossible for you to be the same person today that you were a year or two ago. It’s not uncommon to hear things like, “Why don’t you ___ like you used to?”
They emphasize or draw attention to what others will think.
Statements like, “Are you sure you want to wear/do that? Don’t you care what so and so will say?” are recurrent in shaming relationships.